Hal Jordan! Let's do it! (![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif){kind=small} memlu) wrote,@ 2005-02-28 18:55:00 |
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fic; death note.
This is a spot-saver fic as, alas, I don't think I'm finishing pretentious pornfic today but still felt the need to go "see! I was writing Death Note fic! sort of! It's lame, but, hey, at least it's there, right?" XD;
Have Some Cake With Your Sex:
A Partial List of Yagami Light's Birthday Presents
For his ----eth birthday, Yagami Light received the following in a semblance of this order:
- One (1) pair, homemade socks, courtesy his sister and her delusions of home-ec stardom (unfortunately encouraged by his mother)
- Two (2) pair, boxers one size too small, courtesy his mother
- Five (5) books, an assortment of subpar mystery novels with easy and indeed predicatable endings, courtesy Matsuda
("They're fantastic!" he enthused. "I was guessing even at the end!")
- One (1) book, Sex to Combat Stress, courtesy Misa
("Thank-you," Light said, awkwardly.
"Misa hopes you enjoy it!" she beamed, and checked the front of her low-cut shirt.
"I found the fourth chapter particularly informative," L added, nibbling at what may have been a solid chunk of sugar.
Light made a note to burn it at the nearest opportunity. Possibility: microwave.)
- Two (2) tickets, movie, to a pre-showing of Misa's new film, courtesy Misa and her low-cut shirt
- Two (2) bottles, sake, courtesy his father
("Oh, could I have some?" Matsuda asked, beaming.
"Oo! oo!" Misa bounced in her seat, waving a hand eagerly. "Misa wants to try some, too!"
"How could you," Light accused his father.)
- Three (3) hours of absolute hell, courtesy everyone in his entire life (addendum: impromptu karaoke hour)
- One (1) migraine, courtesy three (3) hours of absolute hell
- One (1) hours of relative solitude, courtesy the bathroom and the locks therein
- One (1) birthday cake, courtesy L
(He left the bathroom only when the raucous sounds of the party - his birthday party, he thought viciously - had faded and the clock struck something close to midnight. Very carefully, he turned the locks, leaned against the bathroom door, and stepped, blinking, into the darkness of his room, the bathroom light bright against his back.
Finally, he thought, and popping the first two buttons of his shirt open, he flicked on the bedside lamp.
L, covered entirely in frosting, blinked up at him from a neat cross-legged position on Light's bed. Light hit the floor, arms windmilling and mouth forming syllables along the lines of 'what,' 'help me,' and 'naked.' L tilted his head to the side, dislodging a cherry. "You should have given me more time to prepare," he said, mildly.
"Are you naked?" Light demanded from the floor.
“As, you might say, the day I was born,” L agreed.
“Naked,” Light repeated, eyes flicking down and then immediately back to L's unflappable, frosting-white face.
“Except, of course, for the frosting," L reminded him, calmly picking the cherry off the coverlet and sticking it once more in place. "Which," he added, after a moment of careful consideration (and sucking frosting from his thumb), "I unfortunately cannot eat by myself.”
"That's very unfortunate," Light said.
"Indeed." L's eyebrows raised. "I'm wondering," he said, nibbling at his thumb as he blinked owlishly. "Are you curious what chapter four has to teach?"
Light fumbled for the rest of his buttons.)
- and an assorted variety (lots) of doodads, thingamabobs, and porn
[end]
edit: 'Informational' is now 'informative.' Dear self: WTF? Kthxbye.
This is a spot-saver fic as, alas, I don't think I'm finishing pretentious pornfic today but still felt the need to go "see! I was writing Death Note fic! sort of! It's lame, but, hey, at least it's there, right?" XD;
Have Some Cake With Your Sex:
A Partial List of Yagami Light's Birthday Presents
For his ----eth birthday, Yagami Light received the following in a semblance of this order:
- One (1) pair, homemade socks, courtesy his sister and her delusions of home-ec stardom (unfortunately encouraged by his mother)
- Two (2) pair, boxers one size too small, courtesy his mother
- Five (5) books, an assortment of subpar mystery novels with easy and indeed predicatable endings, courtesy Matsuda
("They're fantastic!" he enthused. "I was guessing even at the end!")
- One (1) book, Sex to Combat Stress, courtesy Misa
("Thank-you," Light said, awkwardly.
"Misa hopes you enjoy it!" she beamed, and checked the front of her low-cut shirt.
"I found the fourth chapter particularly informative," L added, nibbling at what may have been a solid chunk of sugar.
Light made a note to burn it at the nearest opportunity. Possibility: microwave.)
- Two (2) tickets, movie, to a pre-showing of Misa's new film, courtesy Misa and her low-cut shirt
- Two (2) bottles, sake, courtesy his father
("Oh, could I have some?" Matsuda asked, beaming.
"Oo! oo!" Misa bounced in her seat, waving a hand eagerly. "Misa wants to try some, too!"
"How could you," Light accused his father.)
- Three (3) hours of absolute hell, courtesy everyone in his entire life (addendum: impromptu karaoke hour)
- One (1) migraine, courtesy three (3) hours of absolute hell
- One (1) hours of relative solitude, courtesy the bathroom and the locks therein
- One (1) birthday cake, courtesy L
(He left the bathroom only when the raucous sounds of the party - his birthday party, he thought viciously - had faded and the clock struck something close to midnight. Very carefully, he turned the locks, leaned against the bathroom door, and stepped, blinking, into the darkness of his room, the bathroom light bright against his back.
Finally, he thought, and popping the first two buttons of his shirt open, he flicked on the bedside lamp.
L, covered entirely in frosting, blinked up at him from a neat cross-legged position on Light's bed. Light hit the floor, arms windmilling and mouth forming syllables along the lines of 'what,' 'help me,' and 'naked.' L tilted his head to the side, dislodging a cherry. "You should have given me more time to prepare," he said, mildly.
"Are you naked?" Light demanded from the floor.
“As, you might say, the day I was born,” L agreed.
“Naked,” Light repeated, eyes flicking down and then immediately back to L's unflappable, frosting-white face.
“Except, of course, for the frosting," L reminded him, calmly picking the cherry off the coverlet and sticking it once more in place. "Which," he added, after a moment of careful consideration (and sucking frosting from his thumb), "I unfortunately cannot eat by myself.”
"That's very unfortunate," Light said.
"Indeed." L's eyebrows raised. "I'm wondering," he said, nibbling at his thumb as he blinked owlishly. "Are you curious what chapter four has to teach?"
Light fumbled for the rest of his buttons.)
- and an assorted variety (lots) of doodads, thingamabobs, and porn
[end]
edit: 'Informational' is now 'informative.' Dear self: WTF? Kthxbye.
